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Osho Taught Me

Reading is and has always been one of my favorite hobbies. Unfortunately life happens and sometimes, like everything else, hobbies get swept under the rug. Under any other circumstances it only takes me a week or less to finish a book. It took me a month or two to get through this one. But with the holidays passing, I got […]

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What We Not Gon Do Is……

…..have these lengthy ass discussions about my personal life at the Thanksgiving (or Christmas) dinner table. I’m not sure who or what started this “let’s interview the millennial at the table” trend. Please stop. We hate them. It’s annoying and I do mean that in the most respectful way possible. When I come home for the holidays, all I want to do is relax. A few catching up questions here and there are cool. Don’t get it twisted. But if you’re going to get “deep” with me, I simply ask that it not be done in the group setting. Another thing. My fertility is NOT up for discussion. If, and when (because I know it will) becomes a topic, I will have no choice but to turn the convo into a #Thanksgivingclapback meme. I don’t owe you or anyone else an explanation. I ask (and I shouldn’t have to) that you respect the decisions that I make with my body. Don’t transition the convo into “well are you at least seeing anyone” either. Again, why are you concerned? My present life consists of more than chasing men and making babies. How about, have you been reading my blog? Work discussions are also allowed but please keep it to a minimum. It never fails that I’m hit with the “why aren’t you using your degrees and working in your field” line. Listen. I’m working on it. Let’s talk about the current […]

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Cuffin Season

  Brothers and sisters I come to you briefly today. I’ll just provide a few words of encouragement and discouragement. I recently came across a somewhat general schedule for “cuffin season.” Ah, some of you have no idea what I’m talking about huh? Well. Every year around this time, hundreds and thousands of us “twenty somethings” are competing against another twenty somethings for the heart (I think) of one lucky person. This season starts late summer and continues through the winter months when having someone warm beside you matters. Some of us have no real desire to be included in the foolish and some do. It typically starts down in the DMs (direct messages) and escalates from there. This is the time of the year where the “hey big head” texts start rolling through. But if you’re like me, you know the way to shut it down is to simply reply “who dis?” Works like a charm. Here’s the “general” schedule below   Photo Cred: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cxb-hq6UQAA1btW.jpg Now that the schedule is out of the way, I’ve come up with a few pointers to help you navigate the odds of this joyous season. First, don’t assume. One of the first questions that you should be asking before continuing your recruitment speech should be if this person is seeing someone. The worst thing you can do is engage with a person that is already in a relationship or in someone else’s starting […]

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You Gotta take the Crookeds with the Straights

So um yeah. For the record, this was NOT my intended original post for today. Above is a legit picture of me trying to figure out how to tie it all together. But after a deep convo earlier today, I decided to do some reflecting. Even when we aren’t at our best, it’s important to remember that we are better than where we were. If I had to give a year that’s been my best thus far, I’d have to say it was 2015. Hands down. So many dope things happened especially concerning my growth and development. I bought my first car. I spent a week in Alaska. I turned 25. It was as if a light switch had gone off. All of a sudden I was interested in my credit score, credit cards, traveling outside of the country and even possibly starting a small business of some sort. Even better was looking down and realizing that after waiting forever and a day, my boobs were sitting up under my chin! My body did an entire 360 and I’m grateful for it. But back to the point. Two major things happened in my life in 2015. I taught myself how to cook. I know right. What grown ass woman wouldn’t know how to cook at my age? Well let me tell y’all about my grandma. I learned early on that my role in her kitchen was to wash dishes and […]

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One Time for the Saints, Aint’s and In-Betweeners

Confession. I’m a PGK. Not quite as bad as a PK but close enough. For those of you that aren’t aware, a PGK is a preachers grand kid. A PK is a preachers kid. There are so many stereotypes that come along with being raised in the “spirit filled” household. It will turn you into one of three types of people- a saint, an ain’t or an in-betweener. Now us in-betweeners have our moments from time to time. Sure I can quote scripture. But I can also rap the lyrics to Look Back At It by Trina. Don’t be fooled. A couple of years ago (2011 maybe) I had a spiritual moment. Well, more so a conversation with myself about faith. Yes. Faith the size of a mustard seed for my fellow Sunday school scholars. Rereading it for the sake of this blog, I’m a little confused. Not only was I all over the place but I’m sure that not even I believed what I wrote. Lol. I’ve spent the past few years trying to detox a majority of the foolishness I was taught especially the stuff that isn’t really in the Bible but has been passed down as if it was in Genesis. Back then I was pretty ignorant and judgemental. But “they” say when you know better, you do better right? Here goes….. Lord Where Am I Going: Why Can’t I Walk by Faith? There are roughly five […]

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Friends…..How Many of Us Have Them?

Going back to my childhood (because everything that we do originates there), I learned the importance of friendship. Somewhere at my grandma’s house, there is my kindergarten report card. On this report card I performed satisfactorily in all areas except the comment section. The comment read “Racquell is very social and has lots of friends, but she needs to learn when it’s appropriate to talk.” Yes. I woke up like this. The same applies today as I’m usually getting in trouble at work for being too chatty and having hour long conversations with strangers I meet on the street.  In addition, Jenny (my mother) has had friends near and far for all of my life. I can’t remember a time when they weren’t there for support for whatever shenanigans she had going on. They were at my birthday parties, their kids became my friends and they never failed to give me encouragement and guidance as I was growing up. Many of them still do. So it’s no secret that friendship continues to be a major part of what makes me who I am. Anybody that knows me, knows that I absolutely love my friends. Emphasis on FRIENDS. By that I mean that if we’ve never hung out, been to a wedding or a funeral together or your parents don’t know who I am, then we probably aren’t really friends. I have tons of pictures of them hanging in my work space, in frames, just everywhere. Every […]

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It’s Just Hair

Bald headed. Blonde. Red. Mohawks. Curly. Blown out. Cornrows. Box braids. Bantu knots. Marley twists. For the life of me I can never decide what to do next. There are just so many options to choose from. But at the end of the day, it’s all just hair. I’ve found that whatever I do to my hair, one thing that needs to remain constant is it’s health. Y’all know I LOVED my blonde hair. That one time I took it platinum blonde and looked like Sisqo (per my grandma) was a highlight in my hair journey. 40 volume developer was no joke. It cost me. Not only had I completely destroyed my hair, but I also had to nurse it back to life. That took time, patience, lots of money for products and lastly trial and error. It would be lovely if I could use everyone’s go to staple- coconut oil. Unfortunately I have quite an allergy to it. There are a few products with small concentrations of coconut (sometimes labeled as coco neferius) that I can use such as Aussie and Camille Rose. Anything beyond that and I’m scratching more than a kid with chickenpox. I gave the oils a shot for a brief moment before it hit me. Think about it. As a kid your hair grew like wildfire right? This was with no thanks to relaxers and hot combs with no heat protection. All the “bo-bos” and […]

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